Tell me, am I wrong for... - Page 3

Raitro · 08-10-2008

Quote:

Originally Posted by Empathy

I'm the antagonist because he's practically my best friend. I'd feel like a traitor. There's no solidarity in what I'm feeling, man.

Wait... did you ask him yet, or are you still waiting?

If not, what's the hold up? He's

Quote:

"practically my best friend."

**Crayne** · 08-10-2008

Because even asking would show that he has feelings, and that could be interpreted as treachery.

Raitro · 08-10-2008

Quote:

Originally Posted by Crayne

Because even asking would show that he has feelings, and that could be interpreted as treachery.

Nay! It was HERESY!

Besides, he could always just use the other four dudes as an excuse to ask.

Empathy · 08-10-2008

I kind of asked him today. I set it up very methodically, but I don't feel like explaining how, but at the end I simply said, "so you wouldn't be mad?" He said he wouldn't be mad if I dated her, but he would be mad if, while I was dating her, I had sex with her. For some reason, he doesn't want anyone sleeping with her. lol.

**Vizard** · 08-10-2008

Oh, lol'd.

Now you have limitations, huh? :/

Skrrp · 08-10-2008

Quote:

Originally Posted by Empathy

For some reason, he doesn't want anyone sleeping with her. lol.

'kay ... This is going to go runny at some point. Remember my question about having to choose.

It sounds like this one has a large possibility of coming into play.

Still, if he has no problem with you going out and you are legally (heck, well, just morally - and I mean by my loose standards of morally) allowed to do the nasty, I don't see that he gets a say in it.

The only 2 people who should get a say are her and you, because they are the only people involved at that level of intimacy.

Raitro · 08-10-2008

Quote:

Originally Posted by Empathy

I kind of asked him today. I set it up very methodically, but I don't feel like explaining how, but at the end I simply said, "so you wouldn't be mad?" He said he wouldn't be mad if I dated her, but he would be mad if, while I was dating her, I had sex with her. For some reason, he doesn't want anyone sleeping with her. lol.

WTF? First he doesn't care, and now you need permission to get laid? Are you subconsciously getting penis/pussy-whipped here?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Skrrp

'kay ... This is going to go runny at some point. Remember my question about having to choose.

It sounds like this one has a large possibility of coming into play.

Still, if he has no problem with you going out and you are legally (heck, well, just morally - and I mean by my loose standards of morally) allowed to do the nasty, I don't see that he gets a say in it.

The only 2 people who should get a say are her and you, because they are the only people involved at that level of intimacy.

As much as I secretly hate Skrrp (And don't tell him!), I have to agree with him. You decide if you want to bone her or not. Though, the drawbacks are obvious. Such as the possibility of losing a friend and maybe duking it out with him at one point.

But I am not sure. I've never tried to fuck my best friend's ex-girlfriend before.

Sorry if I make you look like the antagonist there /\. It's just the best way I can put it =/.

Skrrp · 08-10-2008

Quote:

Originally Posted by Raitro

As much as I secretly hate Skrrp (And don't tell him!), I have to agree with him. You decide if you want to bone her or not.

As much as I have no idea you secretly hate me, I need to edit that comment one little bit.

'You both decide if you want to bone each other or not.'

While I agree the friend has no say, the boning is up to both the people in the frame.

Raitro · 08-10-2008

Quote:

Originally Posted by Skrrp

As much as I have no idea you secretly hate me, I need to edit that comment one little bit.

'You both decide if you want to bone each other or not.'

While I agree the friend has no say, the boning is up to both the people in the frame.

Oops. Overlooked that part. >_>

What did you think I was doing? Suggesting rape?

Skrrp · 08-10-2008

Quote:

Originally Posted by Raitro

What did you think I was doing? Suggesting rape?

Not at all. Just that the decision to do the nasty is a big one, and needs to be talked over by both parties and needs to be by mutual agreement. The conversation should never be started with:

'I would like to ...'

but instead with:

'What would you think about ...'

(Well, that is, if the man brings it up. When I was with my first GF and she came out with the statement 'I want to have sex with you', well, better than winning the lottery

But that was the girl that would wake me up by sliding her tongue into my mouth. She was fun.)

**Crayne** · 08-10-2008

Quote:

Originally Posted by Empathy

He said he wouldn't be mad if I dated her, but he would be mad if, while I was dating her, I had sex with her. For some reason, he doesn't want anyone sleeping with her. lol.

A wild guess, he still wants to have a chance to bone her. Maybe he's trying to make her see how lovely he is, and how everyone else is a fucking bastard.

Or maybe not.

Skrrp · 08-10-2008

Quote:

Originally Posted by Crayne

Maybe he's trying to make her see how lovely he is, and how everyone else is a fucking bastard.

This.

Never underestimate the potential for mind games on all sides if you are entering a scenario that has a History.

Additional: If that is his game, it will not work. But, it has the potential to cause more trouble than you should be expected to deal with.

Raitro · 08-10-2008

Quote:

Originally Posted by Skrrp

(Well, that is, if the man brings it up. When I was with my first GF and she came out with the statement 'I want to have sex with you', well, better than winning the lottery

But that was the girl that would wake me up by sliding her tongue into my mouth. She was fun.)

Damn. It seems to me you lost the best girlfriend a man could ask for.

What happened that you lost such a good thing?

Skrrp · 08-10-2008

Quote:

Originally Posted by Raitro

What happened that you lost such a good thing?

Well, the bits I quoted there were from the first 1/3rd phase of the relationship, where the exploring and boundary setting bits were going on. That phase is always the best.

Basically, we moved through the phases (slowly, the entire thing lasted 2 years), but by the time of 6 months in the last fallout phase (arguing (rarely), but it happened, but more the constant nagging and not being able to do anything right), I had had enough.

Advice to everyone: Nobody is perfect. Accept this and accept the flaws in your partner.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ghastly

According to my ex's hand book you should keep a mental list of everything your husband has done wrong and then constantly bring it up over and over.

Q: Why should a man never remember his mistakes?
A: There's no point having 2 people remember the same things.

Raitro · 08-10-2008

Quote:

Originally Posted by Skrrp

Well, the bits I quoted there were from the first 1/3rd phase of the relationship, where the exploring and boundary setting bits were going on. That phase is always the best.

Basically, we moved through the phases (slowly, the entire thing lasted 2 years), but by the time of 6 months in the last fallout phase (arguing (rarely), but it happened, but more the constant nagging and not being able to do anything right), I had had enough.

Advice to everyone: Nobody is perfect. Accept this and accept the flaws in your partner.

Wait a second.......

Are you foreshadowing that we all have to go through these "Phases"?!?! rhetorical question.

Aw man. Why couldn't there be a skip button or something? I hope Empathy doesn't get stuck with a nagging bitch. =O

Though, from the way he describes her, she should turn out to be the irresponsible-having-crazy-buttsecks-with-everyone-in-the-party type.

08-10-2008	#32 (permalink)
Crayne Moderator Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Winland Posts: 7,448 Blog Entries: 10 Rep Power: 54	Re: Tell me, am I wrong for... Because even asking would show that he has feelings, and that could be interpreted as treachery. __________________ NO WAI

08-10-2008	#34 (permalink)
Empathy (22) Super Saiyan 3 Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Parts, Unknown Posts: 2,039 Rep Power: 28	Re: Tell me, am I wrong for... I kind of asked him today. I set it up very methodically, but I don't feel like explaining how, but at the end I simply said, "so you wouldn't be mad?" He said he wouldn't be mad if I dated her, but he would be mad if, while I was dating her, I had sex with her. For some reason, he doesn't want anyone sleeping with her. lol. __________________

08-10-2008	#35 (permalink)
Vizard /gc/ addict Join Date: Oct 2007 Posts: 4,210 Blog Entries: 6 Rep Power: 223	Re: Tell me, am I wrong for... Oh, lol'd. Now you have limitations, huh? :/ __________________