Gohen

goku: oh because were using these earings we'll be fused forever.
Vegeta: WHAT!!! Kakarot! you imbecile, don't you think that's important information.
Goku: I guess, sorry

.half saiyan chrono

this is like stupidist things dbz characters have said and done
oh well
frieza "These balls make me feel something like joy i think. I want to caress them"

.DBZ Goten

you say it's just like the thing that chariters would never say topic yet you still post on it. plus that frezza thing is kinda old

Gohen

Things Dragon Ball characters would never say!:

Goku: No I'm really not hungry
Goku: "Vegeta, you should reconsider. Knight to C-6 allows for mate in 14 moves."
Goku: "Chi-chi, I've had enough with this 'my-son-has-to-study bullshit."
Goku: "No, please. I couldn't eat another bite!"
Goku: "Well, this guy is clearly invincible and we don't stand a chance. I give up."
Goku: "Are you just using me for my body, Chi-chi?"
Goku: "I'm converting to Judaism."
Goku: "Did you know that in some countries in Africa, children don't even have enough food to live?"
Goku: "Chi-chi, for our anniversary, I got reservations at the most exclusive restaurant in town. Afterwards, we can take luxuriously calm carriage ride through the park, and retire in the hot springs of Hakone."
Goku: (after SSJ transformation) "Whoa, the legend is true! My head isn't the only part with golden hair!"
Gohan: "You guys never listen to me! You're the worst parents ever!"
Gohan: "Yesterday I smoked pot."
Gohan: "Leave me alone, I'm spanking the dolphin!"
Gohan: "Woodland creatures make me horny."
Gohan: "Mom! Just shut the hell up for a second and listen to me!"
Goten: "I can't get any play!"
Chi-Chi: "Goku, I love you for who you are, and you're perfect!"
Chi-Chi: "C'mon Goku, let's go do a little 'sparring' together" *wink*
Chi-Chi: "Goku, the firmness of your body is truly exciting me."
Mr. Popo: "Kami, after much thought, I've decided to join the Nation of Islam."
Kami: "Actually, I never really liked that 'Goku' character from day one."
Vegeta: "This blush really accentuates my cheeckbones."
Vegeta: "Wow, with life perspective, this whole 'saiyan pride' mumbo-jumbo seems totally pointless."
Vegeta: "You know what they say about guys with big foreheads..."
Vegeta: "To make up for all I've done, I'm going to become a charity worker
for children's aid."
Vegeta: "Goku, I think it's time I came out of the closet. I've been attracted to you since the day we met, but with all the pressures of society, I was unable to express my true feelings for fear of rejection. Instead, I channeled all my anger at society towards you. Wow, it's great to get that off my chest. Can we still have a meaningful relationship?"
Vegeta: "Bulma, I'm beginning to doubt my ability to... perform."
Vegeta: "I really ought to see a barber."
Vegeta: "Wow, pulling nosehairs is tremendously painful!"
Vegeta: "Oh sure, I may act macho, but *sob* deep down, I'm really sensitive, and I'm hurting."
Brolly: "Maybe I should lay off the Weight Gainer's 2000 formula."
Brolly: "You know what would be really cool? Imagine what I would look like
with red contact lenses!"
Paragus: "Hey, Brolly, get this! Your name resembles the word Broccoli, and mine resembles Asparagus! Guess we have more in common than being father and son, eh?"
Krillin: "I am SO sexy."
Krillin: "All my life I've been in Goku's shadow. This is going to end here and now!"
Krillin: "Perhaps I should reconcile with Piccolo in order to lead a less stressful life."
Krillin: "Wow, I never noticed it before, but my head bears an incredibly strong resemblance to a bowling ball!"
Master-Roshi: "Krillin, please. I'm not interested in lurid pictures of women."
Master-Roshi: "No, it's OK Bulma. Put your bra back on and let's talk this through."
Bulma: "Alright Roshi, you, me, and the bathroom. Let's go!"
Bulma: "I could drop you like a sac of potatoes!"
Bulma: "Computer? What the hell is that?"
Bulma: "I'm considering going with a more conversative, brunette look."
Piccolo: "For Halloween, I'm going to dress up as myself."
Piccolo: "Sometimes I worry about being emotionally unstable."
Piccolo: "Cowardice really turns me on."
Piccolo: *Points towards to women in a quarrel* "Catfight! Mee-oww!"
Piccolo: "My therapist says I need a vacation. I'm thinking about Hawaii."
Piccolo: "Damn, Chi-chi is a FOX!"
Dende: "I feel like doing something really evil."
Cell: "Fighting sucks. Let's go to the movies."
Cell: "Goku, I swear! You are the living image of my ex!"
Cell: "...for better or for worse. Until death do us part..."
Cell: "Onigiri, enough for everyone! I made them myself!"
Buu: "I wish I were an Oscar Meyer weiner! That is what I'd really like to be..."
Nappa: "Am I cute or what?"
Radditz: "My secret? Well let's just say that every serious fighter starts their day with Cheerios."
Captain Ginyu: "Alright Goku! We'll start on 3. Remember, let's keep this fight fair and square."
King Kai: "Do I really sound like that?"
King Kai:"I've been thinking it over, and well, my jokes really aren't cutting it anymore."
King Kai: "Did any of you see Seinfeld last night? Now THAT was funny!"
King Kai: "I'm a fat half-catfish-half-man with a bad sense of humor and ugly sunglasses."







Just a few Jokes

Goten-Knock-Knock
Goku-Who's there?
Goten-Goten
Goku-*opens the door* oh, hi son!
Goten-d**n it Dad, you did it wrong again!!


Bra-Knock-Knock
Vegeta-Who's there?
Bra-Bra
Vegeta-Bra who?
Bra-Dad, stop acting like a kid and open the d**n door!


Baby-Knock-Knock
Goten-Who's there?
Baby-Baby
Goten-Know reall, who's there?
Baby-Baby
Goten-Really? Your name is Baby? HAHAHAHA
Baby-(walking away) there's no sympathy in this f***ing world!



Chi-Chi-Why did the chicken cross the road?
Goku-Ummm, a, wait a minute, ummm, I know this, a, what's a chicken?

more will come i might be a double post though is it is sorry.

Gohen

*~ Goku, Krillin, Gohan & Piccolo gather around..

Goku: "I want you guys to help me look for the Dragonballs. We will meet back here in 3 hours."

*~ A few hours later...

Goku: "How many Dragonballs did you find Gohan?"
Gohan: "Just 3 dad."
Goku: "How many Dragonballs did you find Piccolo?"
Piccolo: "Only 2!"
Goku: "How about you Krillin, how many Dragonballs did you find?"

*~ Krillin all beat up and tired responds...

Krillin: "Dragonballs?!?! I thought you said to bring back the Dragon's Balls..."

Gohan Transformation

*~ One dark night, Gohan glances around and sees something. He then transforms into the were-monkey and starts destroying things

Piccolo: "What?! This can't be! I, I destroyed the... There can't be a full moon!"

*~ Goku looks at Yajirobe

Goku: "What'cha got there?"

*~ Yajirobe is seen bending over picking up a penny

Shenron's Sadness

Vegeta and Goku are fighting and all of a sudden Goku stops and says,"Have you noticed that everytime we sumon Shenron he is always sad". Vegeta replies,"Yeah, now that you metion it he does". They then continue to fight. After a while Vegeta stops and says,"I know why he is always sad. If you had people losing and handling your seven balls you would be pretty miserable too"

The Decision

*~ Yamcha is in the gateway where it is being decided if he will go to hell or heaven, but he did alot of good and bad things in his life so it makes the decision harder.
King Yemma tells Yamcha to tell him one really good deed and he will let Yamcha go to heaven.
Yamcha: "I was driving on the highway when I saw Bulma being harrased by Vegeta. So I stoped the car and went up to Vegeta and punched him in his face, and said leave Bulma alone!"
King Yemma asks, "When did this happen?"
Yamcha: "About 5 minutes ago.

.DBZ Goten

super saiyan 4 goku that's a really good list but we have a topic for this it's called

'Things that DB/Z/GT would never say' you should post that stuff there

cuz there really good

Gohen

oh ok. will do dbsg.

.Ultimate Sonic

haha, thats well good

Gohen

thanks sonic 1344!

sorry less than three words.

.The AMA Ultimate SSJ6

Cool jokes,nice "what DBZ characters will never say"but you forgot one thing,oh wait,you already put Goku of what Vegeta says,I didn't notice that till now.

Gohen

thanx there cool aint they!

.The AMA Ultimate SSJ6

Yes,they definitely are,oh yeah!

Gohen

cool, i appreciate your comments!

.S.S shumee

this is a fun topic

Gohen

thanx people!

i might make up new ones!