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Old 05-11-2008   #1 (permalink)
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Default Savages under God

'K so. This was an assignment for my creative writing class. There are very few pieces I wrote that were not utterly rushed and sort of horrible. This is actually loosely based on a page in the FrankenFran manga and it is rather sort.


Admiral Mimisaka Sousuke ran his thin strong fingers over his starched uniform. The crisp black fabric straightened under his touch as he stood on the deck of his warship as the sun rose high over the flat expanse of ocean though the air was still thick with the darkness of nighttime.

“Manaka, what do you think of the war?” He said looking out over the ocean still. Manaka Jouchi had been sitting on the deck of the warship long before the admiral had arrived, writing a letter it would seem. He’s spirits were greatly dampened by the arrival of the admiral, one false word; one false mood could end him in unwanted trouble. Manaka was of very low rank on the ship, he had one duty and that was to make sure the decks were spotless. With his short cropped hair and standard issue military glasses, Manaka stood out very little. It was strange that the man in charge of this ship would ask for his opinion on anything, much less know his name.

“F-for the glory of Jap-“ Manaka stuttered at first, before being cut off by the admirals’ smooth voice.

“Please answer honestly.” His voice was commanding, as to be expected for an admiral, but the request he commanded was very unbefitting to his rank.

“Well, America has a greater advantage in technology and troops.” He started setting down his pen and note book on the cold deck and leaning forward. “We can hold them off for maybe two or three years to my calculations.” The admiral nodded although Manaka could only see a slight movement in his head.

“Agreed.” He said simply. “The European scientists are fleeing from Germany and escaping to America. Hitler is on the run now, leaving us to fend for ourselves like wild animals.”

“Admiral, I don’t think it’s wise to express your feelings so openly…” It wasn’t wise, if anyone overheard he could be in great trouble. No feeling was worth expressing if it meant that he would be imprisoned for it.

“You know what this war is though, don’t you?” Manaka didn’t answer. “We’re trying to kill our makers.” Manaka scowled, this statement easily offended him and many other loyal Japanese citizens. None of them would want to think of America as their maker, not after seeing the derelict hell hole they turned their country into.

“Well, America did provide us with great advances in our economy, but they control us too much, and were literally starving us of support. I don’t like to think they made us.”

“What you just said, Manaka-san, proves my point.” Mimisaka said, though his back was turned he sounded excited, almost smiling at what Manaka had said even though he had disagreed with him.

“And what point is that?” Manaka felt fear wash over him, talking so disrespectful to an officer.

“We are trying to kill God.” Manaka froze, that was an absurd statement. If Mimisaka was any sort of devote Christian, he most certainly was going to burn for it.

“No one can kill God, Admiral Mimisaka.”

“Exactly.” The admiral walked away just as soldiers started to pile out from the deep belly of the ship onto the deck for morning warm-ups. That conversation, Manaka would keep a carefully guarded secret. Not just for his sake, but for Mimisaka’s as well.

-

I never talked much with the admiral after my service ended and I was placed on the front lines deep in the field of battle, I heard that he was released from service and almost put into jail for his ideas. I never heard what happened to him, but obviously he lived, lived to be a ripe old age in America as I read his obituary in the paper this morning. It feels strange that he was so close to where I had lived in America. This wide expanse of a country and a war buddy, whom he had barely knew, lived so close without even knowing it.
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Old 05-11-2008   #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: Savages under God

Lol, Divine America. Hmpfh.

Anyway. I enjoyed this. Even though it sort of lacked... well, an in-depth meaning. Or something. But you pictured the WW2 climate very well, with attention to detail. Although, an admiral would never adress a deckhand with the suffix "-san", probably. Other than that, a few small flaws here and there, but nothing major.
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