JC#1

yay!
Now befoe I post the next chapter (probably tomarrow) I would like to give the power levels of the characters in my fanfic=
Vegeta (USS2)= 200,000,000
Gohan (15 or 16 years old)=105,000,000
Goten=200
Goten (kamehameha)=350
Chi-chi=100
Goku(SS2)=400,000,000
Gohan(SS2)(11-12 years old)=325,000,000
Vegeta(current after some gravity training)=300,000,000

These power levels may not fit in with the rest of the series, please tell me if you find that kind of mistake.
Note= to really grasp how powerfull they are, compare these to the average human pl of 5.

ultra_blade

The chapter was alright compared to other chapters, it was good but could of been better, it just felt like nothing happened it ended too soon. There were a few minor spelling errors too, but overall it was good and I liked it.

About the power levels, I know that its your fic and all but Vegeta's power is waaaaaay too high, and you didnt show us Super Saiyan 2 Goku and Gohans PLs too, and chi-chi should have around a 100 not 10, shes weak but not that weak.

I hope you dont take this as criticizing comments since I like your fic and want it to be better thats all.

Dark Skywalker

"10" is herclue

JC#1

What spellng errors? could you point a few out?

10 isn't weak. 10 is twice as strong as the average human. But I see maybe she should be 100. I'll edit.

ultra_blade

Don't get angry for picking up minor errors but you did say for me to show you them, what I meant by minor are just a lil typo that can easily be understood.

Error N. 1:
I only needed this one as an example, if you actually had it written as really then I wouldn't of had to stop to understand what you meant, it would of been more smooth if you hadn't made that mistake. I found other similar mistakes but they weren't that important to mention.

I hope you didn't get me wrong, but if you read a fic and stopped for minor mistakes like that you would get tired if your as lazy a I am. I'm also not saying you didn't do a good job, its just that I realized them and wanted you to know about it thats all.

Thanks for adding Goku and Gohan's PL's and fixing Vegeta's PL the one you gave it now sounds a bit more accurate then the other.

JC#1

I was angry? When?Woops! spelled really wrong...I think I edited that...

Dark Skywalker

You should start up the story again

JC#1

Sorry it's taking so long, quite a few of my fanfics may have delayed chapters for a while, so you might have to think about more stuff to do in your spare time. Well I'm honestly sorry this took so long, and here's the next chapter!

Chapter 6:Super Saiyan Goten!

"Soooooo...Why don't yu try powering up? You basicly just focuss the energy into your stomach and try bringing it out---BUT DON'T GO TO THE MAXIMUM!" Chi-chi instructed.

"Why not?" Goten questioned.

"Well if you do, you'll probably make a big explosion and I don't want to get hurt," Chi-chi explained.

"Oh, okay. HHHhhhhhhhhhhhhhaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!" Goten pushed his power about half-way to his breaking point.

"Wow...I need to know how powerfull this is!" Chi-chi said, very excited and extatic. She rushed into the house. Goten wore a puzzled face. Chi-chi raced out wearing the scouter.

"Isn't it a good thing Bulma repeared the scouter and made it more tolerable to high power levels? Wow, I'm starting to sound like her!" Chi-chi giggled. She pressed a button on the scouter.

"wha-WOAH! 15,000! I think that's higher than Gohan's! Oh, wait...Nah, Gohan's is like, amillion or somthing but he's much older than you," Chi-chi talked to herself, and then to Goten.

"Wow...I know I'll regret this...But try going full power!" Chi-chi instructed.

"Geez, you need to make up your mind, now-HHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAA" Goten screamed. Wind blew from his body and Chi-chi began to slip back. The yell got louder, "HAAAAA" and the wind blew across the forest. Chi-chi was blown back but found her balance after a second. The yell got even louder, as Goten tapped into his most deep power! "HHHHHAAAAAAAAA!"
Goten's pupils dissapeared, his hair rose into the air. Goten was then experiencing trouble on his way. It wouldn't go so smoothly.

"HHHH...ngh....HAAAAAAAGYAAAAitAAAA!!" he yelled. A blue aura was formede around his body, witch then expnded and bulged around into a gigantic dome! wind blew on the outside of the dome at hundreds of miles per hour! Chi-chi was holding onto a tree, witch then snapped right off the ground along with all the other trees. Goten passed through the hard part, and it went smoothly again,

"AAAAAHhhh!"

His eyes were glowing gold, his hair witch was still raised in the air started flashing between gold and black. The blue aura turned yellow, and then a sparkling gold! The dome exploded and inside was an unconsciuos half-SS Goten.

"I knew I would regret it, GOTEN! Oh no, Goten!" Chi-chi ran towards Goten. Gohan raced out of the house (half the house, as well as his math book that he was studying, is blown up) and saw Goten laying on the ground. The scouter said 50,000 and rising. Before Gohan had a good look at him, Goten changed back to base form, but his pl was still rising, although not as rapidly.

"What happened?" Gohan questioned.

"Here, take Goten to a hospital, I think he over exerted himself!" Chi-chi pushed Goten into Gohan's arms.

"What happ--" "Just go!" Chi-chi interrupted. Gohan charged off with Goten in his arms.

I'll never make it...I have to go faster! Gohan thought as he was flying. He turned SS and got a big power boost, but it didn't seem to last long. He was slowing down. He couldn't keep up his maximum speed.

Inside the house, Chi-chi was on the phone.

"Bulma? Tell Trunks...Goten can't come over to play tomarrow. No, not for a few weeks maybe...Or possibly never..." Chi-chi said with tears dripping from her eyes.

How serious is it? And when...Or if...Goten recovers, will Chi-chi continue to train him? Is Goten reaching the next level...In his sleep? Is Chi-chi overreacting, or could Goten be in critical condition? Find out on the next chapter of DBZWHG!

Dark Skywalker

that was awesome keep it going when you can

JC#1

My fingers--aaaahhh! You better love me for this! lol, my fingers really are hurting from so much typing. I think I'll post the next one tomarrow but don't log off just yet! there may be a special surprise today!

Dark Skywalker

alright coolio

JC#1

I was gonna post a surprise yesterday (a sneek peak of the next chapter) but I wanted to know you were logged on to read it. I'll post the next chapter in a bit (and you shouldn't have changed yer avatar) after I check on my other fics. Read my DBAF fic in the meantime.

Dark Skywalker

i can change my avatar back when i want i was gonna in a few days

JC#1

Yay! I'll post the next chapter after a few more fic works, 'kay?

Dark Skywalker

alright