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**Vivi** · 05-08-2008

Sorry Blacklisted, but this one I do not like. First, it was way too short to convey a proper message. (IMO) If this is one you haven't done in a while, it shows more rust than the previous stories.

I find it lacking in description, and although dialogue can be good, it was a tad stale. But it's good you are having practice.

05-08-2008	#4 (permalink)
Vivi RPG Team Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: In my room contemplating life and existence. Posts: 4,358 Rep Power: 39	Re: A Very Subtle Indifference Sorry Blacklisted, but this one I do not like. First, it was way too short to convey a proper message. (IMO) If this is one you haven't done in a while, it shows more rust than the previous stories. I find it lacking in description, and although dialogue can be good, it was a tad stale. But it's good you are having practice. __________________ Last edited by Vivi; 05-08-2008 at 09:29 PM.